Fairy Godfather's Revenge
by Feana Tu'akoi

CHARACTERS 
CINDY 
FAIRY GODFATHER

Scene:  CINDY is in her bedroom, sorting through her clothes 
and holding them up in front of the mirror.  FAIRY 
GODFATHER is just off-stage, waiting to appear.

CINDY (frowning).  Yuck!  I wish I had something to wear to the 
school disco tonight.
Fairy Godfather jumps out waving his wand.
FAIRY GODFATHER (excitedly).  Ta da!
CINDY grabs a tennis racket and points it at FAIRY 
GODFATHER as if it is a weapon.
CINDY.  How dare you break into my bedroom!  Get out!
FAIRY GODFATHER.  But I'm your fairy godfather.
CINDY.  Yeah, right!  As if I'd fall for that one!  Get out or I'll 
call the cops!
CINDY waves the tennis racket threateningly.  FAIRY 
GODFATHER squats on the floor and puts his hands over 
his head.
FAIRY GODFATHER.  Please don't hurt me!  I really am your fairy 
godfather.  I came to make your wish come true!
CINDY lowers the racket and looks at FAIRY GODFATHER 
suspiciously.
CINDY.  What wish?
FAIRY GODFATHER.  Your wish to go to the ball, of course.
CINDY.  The ball?  Oh, you mean the disco!
FAIRY GODFATHER.  Yes, Cinderella. You shall go to the ball … er 
… I mean, disco.
CINDY.  Call me Cindy, OK?  No one calls me Cinderella any 
more.
FAIRY GODFATHER.  Fine.  Now, Cindy, the first thing we have to 
organise is the ball gown – it's a cinch.  (He waves his magic 
wand.)  Abracadab ...
CINDY.  Stop!
FAIRY GODFATHER.  What's wrong?
CINDY.  There's no way I'm turning up at school in a ball gown!  
If that's your idea of granting wishes, then you can forget it!
FAIRY GODFATHER (becoming irritated).  OK, so you don't like the 
ball gown idea.  Well, what would you like to wear?
CINDY.  Some cargo pants would be good.  And how about a new 
T-shirt?
FAIRY GODFATHER.  We-ll … I'll see what we've got in stock.  (He 
waves his magic wand.)  Abracadabra!
FAIRY GODFATHER hands CINDY a pair of cargo pants and a 
new T-shirt.
CINDY.  Awesome!
FAIRY GODFATHER (to himself).  Sounds as though "thank you" 
has gone out of fashion too.   (To CINDY)  Right!  Now for your 
glass slippers.  (He waves his magic wand.)  Abracadab …
CINDY.  Stop!
FAIRY GODFATHER.  What now?
CINDY.  Forget the glass slippers.  I can't dance in those 
uncomfortable things.  Give me a pair of Reeboks any day!
FAIRY GODFATHER.  Reeboks?  Suit yourself, kid.  You want 
Reeboks, you can have Reeboks.  (To himself)   I'm beginning 
to wish I never took on this assignment.  (He waves his magic 
wand)  Abracadabra!
FAIRY GODFATHER hands CINDY a pair of Reeboks.
CINDY.  Cool!
FAIRY GODFATHER.  Don't mention it.  Now, I need a pumpkin.
CINDY.  A pumpkin?  What for?
FAIRY GODFATHER.  To make your golden carriage, of course.  
And I'll need a few mice for footmen, and …
CINDY (giggling and shaking her head).  Get real!
FAIRY GODFATHER.  Well, how else are you going to get there?  
Jet plane?  Hot air balloon?
CINDY.  In a taxi, of course!  You can ring one as soon as I'm 
dressed.
She starts to walk off-stage.
FAIRY GODFATHER (mimicking Cindy).  You can ring one as soon 
as I'm dressed.  (To Cindy) Wait!  Stop!
CINDY (looking surprised).  What's wrong?
FAIRY GODFATHER.  Listen here, Cindy-windy.  This won't work!  
You've got no glass slipper to leave for Prince Charming and 
no golden carriage to use for your getaway.  So how will you 
ever find true love, huh?
CINDY.  True love?  Who said anything about true love?  I just 
want to go dancing and have fun.  Anyway, if I liked 
someone, I wouldn't muck around with glass slippers.  I'd 
give him my phone number!
She goes to get dressed.
FAIRY GODFATHER.  Huh!  Typical!  Young people today think 
they know everything.  But this kid's in for a surprise if she 
doesn't get home by midnight.  We'll see what happens to her 
trendy clothes then!  (He starts to walk off-stage, then stops, 
smiles wickedly, and calls off-stage.)  Bye, Cinderella.  Have 
fun tonight – and don't bother to rush home .  Stay out as 
long you like!
FAIRY GODFATHER exits.

Kim Coker's Rise to Fame 
by Rachael Murray

Characters
MISS THOMPSON (class teacher) 
KIM COKER (student)
FAIRY GODMOTHER
KIM'S CLASSMATES (who also double as other characters):
CLASSMATE ONE (and FAN ONE)
CLASSMATE TWO (and FAN TWO)
CLASSMATE THREE (and FAN THREE)
CLASSMATE FOUR (and FAN FOUR)
EXTRA CLASSMATES (and EXTRA FANS)
CLASSMATE (and BEGGAR) 
CLASSMATE (and NEIGHBOUR)
CLASSMATE (and BLACKMAILER)
CLASSMATE (and the very passionate LADY DE VERE )
CLASSMATE (and DOGNAPPER)
CLASSMATE (and BODYGUARD)
CLASSMATE (and GLAMOROUS AUTHOR)
THE MEDIA: 
TV JOURNALIST 
DOREEN (a make-up artist) 
PRESS PHOTOGRAPHER 
TV CAMERA OPERATOR 

SCENE:  MISS THOMPSON is at the front of the class taking a maths lesson.  
KIM and his CLASSMATES are sitting at their desks.

MISS THOMPSON.  Kim!  Do you know the answer?
KIM.  Um, ah …
MISS THOMPSON.  You're not paying attention!  Come on, six times seven equals?
FAIRY GODMOTHER suddenly appears by KIM's desk and raps him with her 
wand.

KIM.  Ouch!  Who are you?  Some sort of genie?
FAIRY GODMOTHER.  Do I look like a genie?  I'm a fairy godmother, stupid, and 
it's the usual story.  You've got three wishes.
MISS THOMPSON.  Kim!  Stop staring into space.
FAIRY GODMOTHER.  Hurry up, kid!  I haven't got all day.
KIM.  I, I … OK!  For starters, I wish that Miss Thompson would take a long 
holiday in Hawai'i.
MISS THOMPSON vanishes (she could bob down behind her desk).
CLASSMATE ONE.  Hey!
CLASSMATE TWO.  Where did she go?
CLASSMATE THREE.  She was right there.
CLASSMATE FOUR.  She's disappeared!
CLASSMATE ONE.  Yahoo!
FAIRY GODMOTHER.  Are you going to make a second wish or not, kid?
KIM.  Oh, sure.  I wish … I wish I were world famous.
FAIRY GODMOTHER exits along with BEGGAR, NEIGHBOUR, BLACKMAILER, 
LADY DE VERE, DOGNAPPER, BODYGUARD, and GLAMOROUS AUTHOR.  
Remaining CLASSMATES crowd around KIM.
FAN TWO.  Kim, may I have your autograph?
FAN THREE.  Me too!
FAN FOUR.  I'd like six autographs for my friends.
FAN TWO.  That's not very tidy!  Can you write it again so I can read it?
TV JOURNALIST, CAMERA OPERATOR, and DOREEN burst into the classroom.
TV JOURNALIST.  Excuse me, please, ladies and gentlemen.  Let me through!  Mr 
Coker, I'm from Television New Zealand, and I wonder if you would give me 
an interview?
KIM.  Of course. (He preens himself.)  I'd be delighted!  Go right ahead.
TV JOURNALIST.  Wait a minute!  We've got to get you made up first.  Doreen!  
Over here, please.
KIM.  What?
DOREEN (pushing KIM back in his chair).  Please sit still, Mr Coker.  Let me get 
your rouge and lipstick on.
Enter PRESS PHOTOGRAPHER
PRESS PHOTOGRAPHER.  Look this way for a second, Mr Coker.  (He clicks his 
camera.)  Thank you.  You look lovely!
TV CAMERA OPERATOR.  No, face this way, Mr Coker.  Please try to co-operate.
TV JOURNALIST (to TV CAMERA OPERATOR).  Camera rolling?  Okay, Mr Coker.  
We've heard reports that you bombed out in your maths lesson today.  Is it 
true that you don't know the answer to six times seven?
KIM.  What rubbish!  It's … ah … um …
TV JOURNALIST (smugly).  It's forty-two, Mr Coker.  And what do you say to 
rumours that you're involved in the mysterious disappearance of Miss 
Thompson?
KIM.  This interview is over!  (He stands up and walks away from his desk.) 
TV JOURNALIST, TV CAMERA OPERATOR, PRESS PHOTOGRAPHER, and DOREEN 
exit, looking pleased with themselves.  FANS crowd around KIM. 
FAN THREE.  Another autograph, Kimbo! 
FAN ONE (waving a camera).  A photo!
BEGGAR (entering).  Mr Coker, please help me.  I've lost my job, I've been kicked 
out of my house, I've run out of money …
KIM.  But I don't have any money to give you.
BEGGAR.  I don't believe you.  You're world famous, so you must be rich.  What a 
miser!  (He sits down in a corner, looking depressed.)
NEIGHBOUR (entering).  I've got news for you, Kim.  I'm taking you to court and 
suing you. 
KIM.  What for?  I'm your neighbour, remember?
NEIGHBOUR.  Who knows?  Noise-nuisance?  Damage to my garden from hordes of 
trampling fans?  I'll think of something. (She exits.)
BLACKMAILER (entering).  Hey!  Remember me, Kim?
KIM.  Vaguely.
BLACKMAILER.  Remember that time you threw up in the assembly hall?
KIM.  I'd rather forget it.
BLACKMAILER (laughing).  I haven't forgotten it, Kimbo, and if you don't pay me 
a hundred dollars, I'm telling the news media.  They'll go wild over that 
story. 
He exits.
LADY DE VERE (entering and holding out her arms to KIM).  Oh, Kim, I'm your 
greatest fan.  You know that, don't you?  When will you marry me?
DOGNAPPER (entering, with a note in her hand, and pushing aside LADY DE 
VERE). Outa the way, Lady de Vere.  Now read this note, mate, and be quick 
about it. 
She exits.
KIM (reading the note).  "Your dog has been kidnapped.  If you want him back, 
send a thousand dollars to this post office box number."  Oh, no!  Poor 
Patch!
BODYGUARD (entering).  Sounds like you could use my personal bodyguard 
services, Mr Coker.  Here's my card.  My rates are very reasonable:  only 
fifty dollars a day – plus meals and expenses.
GLAMOROUS AUTHOR (entering and pushing the BODYGUARD out of the way).  Mr 
Coker, the world is waiting to hear the true story of your rise to fame, and 
I'm writing a full-length book about it.  Is it true that your teacher 
disappeared in mysterious circumstances?  What's the real story behind your 
assembly hall chunder – and your romantic involvement with Lady de Vere?
KIM.  What romantic involvement?
GLAMOROUS AUTHOR (ignoring him).  Is it true that you've been associating with 
low-life blackmailers and dognappers?  And why are you being taken to 
court?
KIM.  I don't know!  I don't know!
Enter BLACKMAILER, DOGNAPPER, and NEIGHBOUR together.
DOGNAPPER.  Great news, Kimbo!  I found out that Lady de Vere's a millionaire.  
If I kidnap you instead of the dog, she'll pay any sort of ransom for your 
release.
BLACKMAILER.  And she'll pay to keep your revolting past out of the newspapers!
NEIGHBOUR.  Law suits are small bickies compared to this!  (to BLACKMAILER 
and DOGNAPPER)  You two seize the bodyguard while I take Kim!  
(They swing into action.  LADY DE VERE yells and wrestles with the 
NEIGHBOUR.)
KIM (struggling).  Help!  Help!  What a terrible day!  Oh, man, I wish I'd never 
seen that fairy godmother!
MISS THOMPSON reappears at the front of the classroom.  KIM gapes at her 
while ALL OTHER CLASS MEMBERS quickly return to their seats.
MISS THOMPSON.  Come on, Kim, what are you doing away from your desk?  
Hurry up and answer the question.  Six times seven equals?
KIM.  Forty-two!
MISS THOMPSON.  Good!  I knew that you knew the answer.  It's a simple matter 
of paying attention.
KIM (looking around).  And nobody's paying any attention to me.  What a 
relief!

Take It from the Top
by Bill Nagelkerke

CHARACTERS
JAYNE (drama teacher)
RO, SAM, and AMBER (students)

Scene:  A classroom with furniture cleared back to make an 
open space for acting.   RO, SAM, and AMBER stand centre 
stage.

RO.  I'm fed up with rehearsals every day.
SAM.  Me too, especially this extra after-school one.  We already 
know our parts really well.
AMBER.  Jayne and her big ideas.  (Mimicking Jayne.)  "Places, 
please!"  We don't need this rehearsal.
RO.  I've got an idea.  Let's act like we're too sick to do our 
parts.  That way we won't have to rehearse!
SAM.  Awesome!  I'll pretend I've got a stomach bug.
AMBER.  I'll start bawling.  What about you, Ro?
RO.  I'm not sure yet.  I'll think of something.  You two go first.  
Just don't overact, or Jayne will suspect something.
Jayne enters.
JAYNE.  What a bunch of slackers.  The play opens tomorrow, 
remember?  Just because I'm a few minutes late, you think 
you can waste time. You should have begun rehearsal without 
me.
RO (winking at the others).  We were discussing our parts.
JAYNE.  Hmm.  Let's see you in action, then.  Places, please.
RO, SAM, and AMBER go to their places.  RO stands at the 
far side of the "stage", furthest away from JAYNE.
JAYNE.  Sam, you lead off.
SAM (clearing his throat).  "It seemed like any other day, when 
…"  (He clutches at his stomach.)  Oooogh!
JAYNE.  That last bit's not in the script.
SAM.  I feel sick.  Grooogh!
RO.  He ate a pie for lunch.  It must've been off.
SAM.  Wrooogh!
JAYNE.  For goodness' sake!  Run to the loo if you're going to throw up.
SAM.  I'm OK.  If I sit down for a while, I'm sure I'll feel heaps better.
JAYNE.  Go on, then.
SAM crosses to the  other side of the stage, passing RO on 
the way.
SAM (whispering).  Hope I didn't overdo it.
RO (whispering).  No, that was excellent.
JAYNE.  Let's start again.  I'll take Sam's role.  "It seemed like 
any other day, when …" 
AMBER starts crying.
JAYNE.  We're not up to the sad part yet, Amber!
AMBER (sobbing).  It's not the play.  It's Max.  He was run over last night. 
JAYNE.  Max?
AMBER.  My cat.  My darling cat.  He's at the vet's now.  I've 
been trying not to think about him, helpless on the operating 
table, but … (She sobs more loudly.) 
JAYNE (sighing).  Go and keep Sam company until you feel 
better.  You can't rehearse in that state.
AMBER crosses to the side of the stage, passing RO on the 
way.
AMBER (whispering).  How did I do?
RO (whispering).  Perfect.  Great act.
JAYNE.  We'll jump to the final scene and run through your long 
speech, Ro.
RO.  OK.  I'll just find the place …  Oh!  (He totters dizzily to 
the front of the stage, collapses onto the floor, and lies still.)
JAYNE.  Now what?
SAM and AMBER hurry over to RO.  JAYNE follows more 
slowly. 
SAM (whispering to AMBER).  Talk about overacting! 
AMBER.  He's fainted!  We'll have to cancel the rehearsal.
JAYNE.  Stand back.  Let me see.
JAYNE leans over RO and feels his pulse.
JAYNE.  Ro hasn't fainted.
SAM.  He hasn't?
JAYNE.  No, he's dead! 
SAM and AMBER.  Dead … !
JAYNE.  What a disaster!  Now I'll have to rewrite the whole play.
AMBER.  The play!  Is that all you're …
JAYNE.  We'll have to make sure no one finds out about this 
until after opening night.  
SAM.  But Jayne, Ro has just …
JAYNE.  I know exactly what he's done!  And it's very 
inconsiderate of him.  It could kill the play if people heard 
that one of the actors had died during a rehearsal.
SAM and AMBER.  Jayne!
JAYNE.  This is what we'll do.  Sam, you ring Ro's parents and 
tell them that he's staying overnight at your place.
SAM.  You're not for real – are you?
JAYNE.  Amber, we'll stash Ro's body under the stage for the 
time being.  You take one foot, and I'll take the other.  
AMBER.  But ...
JAYNE.  Hurry up.  We've wasted enough time already.  We'll 
have to drag him down the stairs.
JAYNE reaches for one of RO's feet, and AMBER reluctantly 
picks up the other.  Before they have time to drag him, 
RO leaps up. 
RO.  Down the stairs!  No way!  I'm not dead!   
SAM.  You're not? 
AMBER.  Hey, he's alive!
JAYNE (beginning to laugh).  Of course he's alive. (She laughs 
more loudly.)  Ro, those were the worst bits of acting I've 
seen in years.  
RO.  They were?  I mean right, sure. 
AMBER.  Yeah, you didn't fool anyone, Ro.
JAYNE.  Sam, Amber, your performances were just as bad.  Mind 
you, if you'd rehearsed properly, you might have convinced 
me.  Now, shall we get this show on the road?  
SAM, AMBER, and RO (together, mimicking Jayne in a friendly 
way).  Places, please!
JAYNE.  OK, OK.  I know how you feel, but if you work hard, I'll 
take you all out for pizza afterwards.  (SAM, AMBER, and RO 
cheer.)  From the top, Sam.  Ready?
SAM.  "It seemed like any other day, when …"
Everyone freezes.


